Huff. And it's not like the past weekend was any better. It all pretty much went to shit last Saturday night when we came home from our race in Boston, which to me, was a humorous finish to the day. Granted it was beautiful out, I don't think it was our best performance. But hey, you win some and you lose some. We didn't really have much to lose to be honest but it was great to get out there for a race and see where we stood against the competition. And competiting is exciting as is the course we raced at. The Charles River isn't exactly a straight shot down; it involved hard turns and lots of bridges. You fuck up and you could see yourself flipping and hitting another boat, something I didn't witness but heard happened.
What a bummer: Head of the Charles almost crash 2009
A few drinks and tiffs later and I was at a crew party. Didn't go to a bar where all alums and tons of students go to on Homecoming Weekend. Yeah, it was Homecoming Weekend and I guess the race/arguments I got into took all the fun out of me. I still drankkkkkk. But I didn't get slizzard. And it's my last year here and I still haven't gone to said bar. Whatever. I was just not with it that night. Sooo bummy and my friend from home sucks at answering her phone...well, her boyf's phone considering she currently doesn't have one. So I have to text/call her boifrann if I need to talk to her. Ugh fuck nuggets.
The next day I woke up early and went on a long azz run to clear my head. I ran farther than usual, hitting an exit to White Plains but refrained from going all the way there. I turned around and came back to mi casa an hour later. Was my head clear? Nah. I felt the same way I felt before my run...shitty.
I had an exam to study for as well. Had plans to go to the library to study but instead laid in bed and watched trash tv. Drove my biffle to the dentist, got upset like a child (because I still felt shitty), napped, half-ass studied for my exam, and hibernated in my room until bed time. I woke "early" to study more but not really. Got to campus a half hour before the exam and studied a bit. By the time the exam came, as usual I thought the same thing, "Fuck it. There's nothing more I can retain now. So what's the point of cramming? Let's just get this overwith." I breezed through it and thought to myself maybe I am one of those people who don't have to study so hard for exams and still do well. But I feel this only makes sense to me in certain areas, math not being one of them. But I haven't even gotten the test back so we'll see what happens. I felt that I did ok and I wasn't stuck on any questions. They were all essay/short answer ones and I only had to do 5 out of 6 of them.
I went to the library afterwards to kill the 2 hours I had before work.*
*Before getting the bad news about my laptop, I went to the foodie corner to get a hot apple cider. But what's great about the fall at the campus library foodie corner is that they have seasonal drinks! I wanted to get the Tazo Chai Caramel Cider (I've ordered it before but the other lady who made it assumed since the word "Chai" is in it, it's simply just a chai with caramel syrup. Nooooo, I said CIDER too! Clown). The lady who made it today made me the right thing but basically added a whole closet full of sugar in it as well. I could just see how much fat I was adding to ass as she made it with whole milk (I didn't know milk was involved but ok...if I did I woulda said "skim milk" as usual), caramel syrup, and a sugar packet (really?) into my cup.
I figured I'd update this thinger but instead downloaded new music on the library comp because my laptop is dying...literally. I got my laptop back from IT who told me there was a problem with the hard drive. I have to take it to a Mac store to get checked out or be told that's it dead, nothing can be done to fix it. So farewell to memories of oz, blackmail on my biffle, music and shows I've downloaded, old research papers I busted my ass on, and everything else that was on there. I'm not as upset as I was when the comp quit on me in the first place. Mama kinda put things in perspective for me. She said that I'm not the only person this has happened to. It does suck but I'm getting a new comp anyways. And I figured the pictures from oz are on my Facebook. It'll just be a bitch to save all of them. As for my music, all of it is on my iPod so I'll just have to figure out how to transfer them from my pod to a new comp once I get one.
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| It's been a good 4 years :(... |
As for school work, I really don't know how to do any. I do my homework when it's due but for long-term projects that I should be working on, I haven't. I stress about it for a split second then continue whatever I'm doing. I need to make a conscious effort to get a move on it before I start crying to my counselor about how my life is in shambles (even though I do that already...sorta). Like I said, things could be worse. I'm just in a really shitty mood and don't feel like doing anything except cradle a bottle of wine in my arms.
I got this bottle of organic "almost dry reisling" from oregon. It's pretty good! I'm glad I don't have night class tonight because I'll be hanging out with said bottle.
I need to get a move on my Halloween costume too. Fuck.
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